Friday, October 21, 2011

Third Campaign Challenge

Hey, I just finished the third campaign challenge. I wasn't aware of this campaign challenge until yesterday, so I'm sorry I missed the first two.

I created a fictional piece. It is a 300 word count and I used all three of the made up words. My title is: I'm Not Going to Stay a Castaway

If you liked this I am number (93)

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I'm Not Going to Stay a Castaway



    “Wastopaneer, It’s happening again!” Timmy folded over on his knees in the sand. “Please stop growling” he said smacking his stomach. Visions of scrabbled eggs continued to taunt him. He thought about swimming but wasn’t sure how far the mainland was.
    He yelled at the seagulls, “If I spend another day here I’ll tacise into the sand.” Timmy grabbed seashells to throw at the large hole in the flipped over canoe. Where is the search party? he thought.

    He jumped a hundred times waving and yelling. He tried to build a signal fire and even climbed the tallest palm tree. It was useless. “I’m doomed,” he said as he threw stones into the waves. How many times could I draw my name in the sand or count the sailboats off in the distance before I slowly lose it? were questions that haunted Timmy.

   Waiting for nobody, he plopped down and curled into a ball for warmth. Sleep took over and he dreamed he was feasting on the finest dishes of meats, pastas and desserts. But not long enough. They all turned into garbage. A landfill of rotting garbage.

   The smell from his dream stung at his face and woke him up. He rubbed at his nose. Somehow Timmy synbatecly brought outside smells into his dreams, which only a few people in this world can do. There behind him was the culprit. A decaying horseshoe crab turned upside down. Timmy went to kick it away when a large seagull screeched in his ear and landed on top of it. It picked at its insides. Though repulsive to watch, it gave him incentive to get off the island before he was picked at by the same flying scavenger.

   “Goodbye beach,” were Timmy’s last words before he set out swimming back towards civilization.

18 comments:

  1. Ooh I loved it! Great descriptive language! Nice take on the challenge!

    I'm entry #5

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  2. Oh I hope he makes the swim. Getting picked over by seagulls is not a fate for a good guy ;)

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  3. I really liked it! Poor guy. To be able to see civilization and not contact them.

    I'm off to vote!

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  4. Good idea to get out of there. Mine is #56

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  5. Excellent use of the senses. I had a good image of the scene. That helps a lot when following along. Once again, great job! :)

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  6. Good job! Nice description & use of the words! ; )

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  7. I love the MG take. I really felt his desperation. Well done. I'm a new follower :)

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  8. Fantastic imagery! I wonder if he makes it?

    Mine is #25.

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  9. "Though repulsive to watch, it gave him incentive to get off the island before he was picked at by the same flying scavenger."

    Love the image and progression of this sentence. Like me, you have written for children, not, adults, and I like it!

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  10. I loved the ending where he decided to try and get back to civilisation - it's all about survival!
    (my entry no.#47)

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  11. Thank you so much for the compliments. At first I was trying to write for an even younger audience. lol. Thanks for the votes! :)

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  12. Hi Jennifer,

    thought you did a great job, well done.

    mood
    (now following)
    Moody Writing
    @mooderino
    no. 79

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  13. This is great! I don't know how I missed you in the campaign, Jennifer. I thought I'd been to all the picture book writers many times over, but somehow this is the first time I've found you. So glad you stopped by my blog so I could find yours :)

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  14. Thanks for the compliment Moodinero!

    Susanna, I'm so glad I found your amazing blog! It's so full of fun and interesting stuff. I could spend all day there!

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  15. great imagery and language.

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  16. Jennifer - Nice job. Great children's story.

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  17. Thanks for the encouraging words Damyanti and Maeve! :)

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Love to hear what you have to say!

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